*sigh*

what a GREAT weekend.. i havent had such a good weekend in a long time. just thought i'd share.

ta ta for now.

lol

it's about me now II

so its day 4 in my "silent treatment" by the loser. and still no effects. i've tried to contact him a few times, and no answer. so im officially finito. got other things to worry about.....like my TRIP! whew in 7 days i will be makin it rain on the Las Vegas strip!!! i dont lost my mind buying shoes and outfits for my lil mini vacay....i even decided to complete my life transformation with a new haircut and all..

im not letting him get me down, as much as he would like to lol. And everyday i get the cold shoulder from him, i get the warm hug from my new "boo" ( who really isnt "new" per se but we're closer now than we were before)

im feelin like a milli a milli a milli. lol

p.s. Im feelin The Dream's new album.. Fancy & Right Side of Ya Brain are on heavy iPod rotation.

Racism Aint Dead...

ok, so this Russian dude been tryna get at me via myspace/aim for a while now. but i keep tellin him im not interested. obviously he has issues with rejection..cuz this is how the last convo we had went.

so funny you dont see peoples true colors til you dont give them what they want. Ima call him "whitey" for today..


Whitey: hello wow long time?
Whitey: how u been?
Me: ive been ok
Whitey: o ok arm is better and all that
Me: so so
Whitey: ooo
Whitey: ill make it feal better for u lol
Whitey: so whats up would u still meet me and chill with me
Whitey: or u still not ready for all that?
Me: i cant
Me: lol u so determind
Whitey: why not?
Me: because i cant
Whitey: whatever
Me: whatever?
Me: hmm ok, whatever.
Whitey: go enjoy your est ny men
Me: ? east ny
Me: lol i dont fraternize with those males thank you
Whitey: wa
Me: ??
Whitey: a nice white guy is trying to chill with u and u r talking mad dum i cant for real u pissing me off
Me: first of all dont come at me like that
Me: secondly white black chinese it doesnt matter
Me: im going thru somethin personal right now so i dont have time for anyone
Me: so please save that for somebody else.
Whitey: whatever shorty u to young to go thrue shit for real
Me: thats what u think but i dont know the life ive lived
Whitey: u tell it to someone else u live woth moms
Me: so u cant tell me
Whitey: in da hood
Me: lmao
Me: sorry sweety i do live with my mother but not in the hood
Whitey: o yea where do u live
Me: wouldnt u like to kno
Whitey: u prob live canarcie bed sty est ny or bronsivelle
Me: lol nope nope and nope
Me: sorry
Whitey: flatbsuh
Me: nope
Me: hahahaha
Whitey: crown hights
Whitey: hood
Me: silly little thing
Me: nope
Whitey: all your projects i just named
Me: lmao
Whitey: fort green
Me: im from the projects now?
Me: this is good
Whitey: well im sure u dont live in bayridge or bergan beach or mill basen
Me: lmao
Whitey: so please do tell
Whitey: im hoping im so wrong
Me: please dont insult me
Me: cuz i live in one of the 3
Whitey: that u r going thrue some times
Me: and im going to need u to spell check yourself before you get "smart"
Whitey: i dont care how to spell your areas as longest i know how to spell mines we good
Me: just because i'm not jumpin at your offer you want to act brand new
Me: trying to pull a race card
Me: hahahahha
Me: please
Whitey: i have nothing but been nive to u and showed u mad love
Whitey: and alwyes asked u how u feal
Whitey: but i get nothing but a bad vibe from u all the time for real
Whitey: im not some fucking loser here
Me: and i never deferred you from that
Me: i never said you were but i cant just be chillen with anybody right now
Whitey: i dont sell rocks on the corner of your hood im a very nice guy with a degree who was looking to meet some1 new
Whitey: but im sure u still chill and go out side right
Me: ok and i dont live in a "hood" i come from a very good home i go to a good college but im going thru somethin personal
Whitey: im sure your life is still going
Me: no i dont
Me: i dont party i dont chill
Me: unless its a family function
Me: i work. thats all i do.
Whitey: then u must be a depressed person
Me: no sweetheart im not depressed but i have to make decisions at the moment that may change my life
Me: not that you need to know because i dont owe you an explanation
Whitey: u must be having a baby by shovon then
Me: sorry im not knocked up either
Me: do you have any other black girl stereotypes you want to throw this way?
Me: because its amusing.
Me: your whole attitude towards "hood" people is sad
Me: because everything you named i never came from.
Me: but you only see that im brown and you generalize
Me: such a shame.
Me: i guess not coming from the "hood" having a doctor and an army sergeant as parents still makes me from the "hood"
Me: having my own car makes me "hood"
Me: nothing to say now?
Me: you had so much to comment on before


he still hasnt responded..hmpf

its about me now

lately I've been feeling so good about my decisions. altho right now the loser isn't speaking to me, I'm still happy. the old me would've been trying so hard to get him to talk to me, but i realize now that that was my big mistake. why should i kiss his ass when i know i was right for me? after all we've been thru, he's mad because i wont sleep with him. the man who claims to love me no matter what is actin like a bitch because he's not the center of my world anymore. Get over it. Its time to move on. you wanna ride the single train, so hop aboard the shit, don't hang from the railing.
Its not even a point of me talking to someone else now, because i am. and he makes me happy. I thought that the loser would appreciate getting his space, but it seems like he wants to eat the candy, and not get the cavities..nope, not on my watch. the old me, maybe. but over the last few months I've come to realize that i did all of my living for everyone else's happiness and not my own. and cant do that anymore. because if god is to snatch me from earth tonight i want to go knowing i lived as best i could for ME first, and everyone else second.

ima consider this my second coming.

lmao..god this video is a mess

man i used to be rotflmao to this shit





she reminded me of my old dance teacher something serious
i would've just been like "take me to jail pleasssseeee"
he was gettin it IN lmao *kick ball change*

Is this how it is?

So now that I'm back on my single grind, me and my "ex" had a discussion about how to date.

He was saying that he found it ok to talk to 5 different girls, with no intention to date any of them. This is how it went:

Me: "so, if you wanna start dating one of them, how do you let the others know?"
Him: "i don't."
Me: "you..don't.."
Him : "na, not if they don't ask"
Me: laughs " so, if she doesn't ask if you're talking to anyone you wont say anything? what girl is gonna ask u if u chillin with anyone if y'all were talkin and now ur dating?"
Him thinks "na, i don't mean it like that"
Me: "yea you do. and then you're gonna bitch and moan that she always questions you, yadda yadda... that's the worse way to go into a relationship"
Him: i know, but i wanna exercise all of my options before i make a commitment"
Me: "right..and how many successful relationships do you have under your belt?"


.....

I'll love him, and kiss him, and call him George...

Last night i tried sooo hard to convince my mom last night to let me buy a bunny. lmaoo i mean, my landlord said not cats or dogs..she didn't say didly squat about a bunny. My mom was like "girl, he gonna get lost in all them shoe boxes you got!" Sheesh, so my obsession with footwear is effecting my opportunity to buy a pet?

a small setback in my eyes.

i got it all planned out...lol. I hate being devious but i want one sooo bad. We used to have a class rabbit in 2nd grade named Hosenfeffer and i got to take him home a few times and *swoon* i haven't been the same since.

so wish me luck folks, maybe when i get back from Vegas I'll post some pics of my new pet. lol