Tuesday, December 29, 2009

ok, im back to normal again.

I really went off in my last post, didn't I?

Its amazing how angry you can be in the heat of an I'm not upset anymore. Thank goodness. I don't like the angry me.

I have been keeping my distance from the few men in my life that seem to be in heavy rotation as far as me being "situated". Technically, I'm not spoken for. But I do have feelings for each of them. And each set of feelings is completely different.

Luckily I'm not trying to make anything out of any of these "relationships". I'm completely going with the flo.

And NO, I'm not sleeping with any of them. That tends to mess things up. Lol.

The only thing I'm kind of afraid of is possibly falling for them. Yes, them. I mean, its possible. They all have different qualities and different things about them that I'm attracted to and that I like. They all offer something different.

As far as the new year goes, I'm not going to have any preconcieved notions about my relationship status. Its strictly going to be about me, my health and my happiness. Maybe more.

Who knows?

Saturday, December 12, 2009

are committed relationships dead?

What the hell does a woman have to do to find a man that

A) does not already have a relationship in progress

B) have baby mama drama

C) doesn't want to fuck every girl in the world?

I cant deal with men anymore. I'm like "okay, if i give so'n'so so much time then I'm bound to be in good, right?


Everybody wants SOMETHING. Whether its money, all sex and no commitment, to boss you around.,..SOMETHING. Like COME ON ALREADY.

I'm kinda over this whole cycle i find myself being constantly pulled into. I'm a good person. I try to stay clear of any type of drama. but for some reason these NIGGAS(yeah, i said it) keep finding me and try to dog me the FUCK out.

So you expect me to sleep with you, give you money, but we never do anything?

So you expect me to sleep with you, and when your "girl who's not really my girl but shes still my girl" is in town i just disappear like its nothing?

Do I Have some sort of sign on my damn forehead that attracts these assholes?

Its like i need to be the anti-Christ to get anywhere with these people. Im so over this whole relationship thing its not even funny

Things can go from sugar to shit in 0.05 seconds. And with that i am DONE.

Monday, December 7, 2009

Time flies...

So its already December. Wow. Where the hell did 2009 go?

Personally I don't mind watching the bitch go. 2009 was a year for the books. And not in a good way. Between breakups, illness and funerals I couldn't catch a break!!!

I'm not gonna be cliche and say "2010 is gonna be my year" because well, frankly I don't know if it really is. I'm going to try and make the best of the coming year. This includes completing surgery, returning to school full time and keeping far away from shitty ass males.

That last one is going to be tricky. Not because I don't WANT to(we've all seen my track record....I need to) but because no one is who they really are until about 6 months to 2 years into a relationship lol.

I started seeing someone new.. Shut up.

I don't plan these things! They just happen.

Pd is pretty freakin awesome. But in the back of my mind I can hear the tiny tick tock the let down clock counting down.

Maybe I shouldn't. Blah.

Saturday, December 5, 2009

So i'm a little bored...

I have time to kill.. so why not do one of these questionnaire thingys?

ok, here goes.

1. What is the color of your toothbrush? Purple
2. Name one person who made you smile today. Jada
3. What were you doing at 8 am this morning? Washing my hair
4. What were you doing 45 minutes ago? Checking my email
5. What is your favorite candy bar?
6. Have you ever been to a strip club? Once.
7. What is the last thing you said aloud? 'I'm In the living room'
8. What is your favorite ice cream? Butter Pecan
9. What was the last thing you had to drink? Cranberry Grape juice
10. Do you like your wallet? Yes, it has my life organized into nice little slots :-)
11. What was the last thing you ate? A handful of Cap'n Crunch

12. Have you bought any new clothing items this week? 2 tops and a skirt
13. The last sporting event you watched?
Lakers/Heat game last night
14. What is your favorite flavor of popcorn? Caramel Corn.
15. Who is the last person you sent a text message to? Vic
16. Ever go camping? A few times at sleep away camp
17. Do you take vitamins daily? Absolutely.
18. Do you go to church every Sunday? Occasionally
19. Do you have a tan? Nope.
I'm dark enough lol
20. Do you prefer Chinese food over pizza? Chinese, im lactose intolerant.
21. Do you drink your soda with a straw? Yea. I think drinking from a bottle or a can isnt ladylike
22. What did your last text message say? ...'Do you see the snow'
23. What are you doing tomorrow? Sleep and nothing.
24. Favorite color? Purple
25. Look to your left; what do you see? A laptop case and an iPod.
26. What color is your watch? Havent worn one in 3 years
27. What do you think of when you hear “Australia”? My Nana
28. Would you strip for money? No..for fun? yes. LOL
29. Do you go in a fast food place or just hit the drive
thru? Drive Thru
30. What is your favorite number? 25
31. Who’s the last person you talked to on the phone? Reggie
32. Any plans today? Might go out tonight, well see
33. In how many states have you lived? 3
34. Biggest annoyance right now? Not being able to take a lengthy vacation
35. Last song listened to? Winter Song- Sara Borealis
36. Can you say the alphabet backwards? Yep
37. Do you have a maid service clean your house? Yea but she's not from a service lol
38. Favorite pair of shoes you wear all the time? During the day? Uggs. Ultimate comfort
39. Are you jealous of anyone? No, cant think of anyone
40. Is anyone jealous of you? Probably not
41. Do you love anyone? Yep, lots
42. Do any of your friends have children? A few of them do
43. What do you usually do during the day? Work. Hard
44. Do you hate anyone that you know right now? I did, but not anymore
45. Do you use the word hello daily? Does 'Hi' count? if so, yes.
46. What color is your car? Blue
47. What size wedding ring do you wear? I'm a 6
48. Are you thinking about someone right now? Yes i am...
49. Have you ever been to Six Flags? I cant even count how many times lol
50. How did you get your worst scar? Surgery. Emotional scars are a whole nother story...

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

that was easy.

Ok so Newbs decided to show his ass, again.

Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.

I don't think there is enough space for me, him and his ego in a relationship, unless its on a hi and bye level.

When you're not treated up to par you tend to not realize when there is that big ass neon sign saying DON'T DO IT YOU IDIOT! Because you're caught up in the moment. Well, at least that's my excuse.

I'm not even going to go on about how much I hate him blah blah blah because you've all heard it before. But just as I managed to maintain 50 feet in my relationship with the loser, newbs is slitherin his way into that lane.

I guess the saying "maybe god sends us bad guys so when we get a good one we can be thankful" is t r u e.

As of now I'm chillin. PD and I are cool, which is nice. So I'm not alone. Remember, there is a difference between alone and lonely.

We're going on a first "date" later this week(lol) I'll let you guys know how that goes.

Wednesday, November 11, 2009


Ok so its been...idk almost 2 weeks since newbs decided to reappear.

And he won't go away.

This has caused for me to sit and try to figure out...what is it that he wants?

Its not like my love wasn't the ishhh...(Lol) but he can get lovin anywhere. Why is he bothering me?

And to add to that. PD, the old/new thang is such a doll. But when I'm at work, he's free and vice versa. So we really don't get to see eachother a lot.

He's one of those guys that you kinda dream about. Real affectionate and all that other hodge podge. But then again, so was Newbs in the beginning.

There are nights where I find myself ignoring the both of them. Because I find myself in dack overload. The phone calls, bbms, pictures. (LORD the PICTURES) can be a bit overwhelming at times.

Maybe its because i was so used to only Loser or No one approaching me, this is all new to me.

I think I can handle it.

The only thing that I'm trying to get a hold onto is my Ever present attraction to newbs and my newly developed attraction to PD.

What the HELL am I to do?!? *pulls hair*

Thursday, October 29, 2009

hold the damn presses!

So yesterday was going just fine and dandy until right after I blogged. My phone vibrated and I figured it was a bbm so I disregarded it until I was finished some paperwork.why when I looked to see who it was it was a text. From NEWBS.

Yes, the same Newbs who I said I was done with because he chose a very inappropriate time to disrespect me.

Yes, the same Newbs who I haven't spoken to since October 1st, the night we had that dispute in my car.

He had the nerve to hit me up like everything was peaches and damn cream. I couldn't believe it. Then had the nerve to say "I still feel some kind of way" yea? Cuz I told you you weren't shit or cuz I said I don't want to love someone like you, who disregards my feelings to prove a point.

I asked him if he wanted to talk any problems he had out with me, because last time I checked I wasn't a fuckin mind reader. Let me know how u feel. I don't assume.

I'm still waiting to hear from him. I honestly hope he knows I don't plan on waiting forever. I all but told him out relationship can cease where it stands.

I have no problem moving on with my life.

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

keepin u current

So I've been thinkin about moving off on my own. Way from most of the family to Manhattan. Yes the big cityyyy.

in other news. I've been dreamin a lot about Newbs (aka Assholus Majorous) lately. I don't know if maybe my heart is trying to drop my mind hints. Yea I miss him, but that motherfucker will have to seek me out and beg for my forgiveness before I will even TALK to his ass. Hmmphf. Let he try wid duh!

This rain has made me want t cuff like crazy!

(Cuff, Cuffin: means to be boo'd up for all you non-New Yorkers)

I've been enjoyin thecompany of my old/new friend. I'm not looking for anything, and neither is he which is PERFECT. We talk and enjoy eachother company. Which is refreshing.

P.S. Halloween is saturday. I will get to wear my costume from last year. Didn't have it on for long if u catch my drift lol.

Tuesday, October 20, 2009


Lately I've been trying to think of what I plan to change about myself/ my life in the coming year. To be honest with you all, 2009 couldn't end fast enough for me. Its been such a TRYING year to say the least.

Between new life, death, surgery, loves found and lost... It was a rollercoaster. But I digress.

I was able to fulfill my resolution from last year and made 2009 my year to strictly do me. If I wanted it done I did it. Even if I didn't succeed(which was a rare occuance) I can honestly say that I tried. I did a complete personal revamp and I must say that I'm happy with the new me.

As far as 2010 goes, my 2 main goals are to finish surgery and go back to school *crosses fingers*

In reference to my love/personal life, I'm not going to make any plans in particular. I'm just going to ride the wave. I'm 21 for crying out loud! Lol. If love comes my way, great. But I'm sure as hell not going to go look for that bitch, let it find me. Lol

Let's see how this goes.

Monday, October 19, 2009

My aunt passed 4am this morning after battling breast cancer for two years. It was so hard for me to see my grandmother, whose birthday was yesterday hear that she was ill. My family has had to bury 5 members this year.

Every morning I wake up and wonder if the day ahead will be better or worse than the day before.

My health is in better shape, but my heart is heavy. I'm tired. I put on a smile everyday even when I want to cry. I know that there's someone out there that has it worse than I do. I wish I could meet them so I can ask how they do it.

For all you women ages 35 and up PLEASE GO GET YOUR MAMMOGRAM! Early detction saves lives. Don't be afraid. Because when its too late, its too late.

If you need any information regarding being screened, feel free to contact me.

Saturday, October 17, 2009

its been a while....

I'm still alive and kickin blog world. I haven't blogged in 2 months. I've been so busy. Between work and my personal life. A lot has changed in such a short period of time I've really had to sit and evaluate the path that I was taking and whether it was the right one for me.

I lost an aunt to terminal cancer at the beginning of the month. And today I found out that another aunt that has breast cancer is in hospice.

Newbs and are officially over. I can tell you all this because we haven't spoken in over 2 weeks. He chose a very inappropriate time to disrespect me after we had a minor argument in my car. I love that man to pieces. But I refuse to let him think that he can treat me like shit to get his point across. If he was willing to let a good woman like me walk away because of his own cockiness and selfish pride than so be it.

I've moved on from him. I cried and so on. Then someone came around and has been treating me so well I can say that I believe that maybe newbs was a building block for my confidence. He wasn't the finishline, just a checkpoint.

Recently I've realized how many people I've let take advantage of my kindness. This revelation doesn't necessarily mean that I'm not going to continue to be who I am and always give 1000%. It just means that I now know what I honesty deserve and what I am too good to have to deal with.

Everyday is a challenge. And everyday I look forward to completing whatever task is at hand. Because I could be off way worse than I am.

Until tomorrow... ♥

Monday, August 31, 2009

A little update

OK so i know that I've been MIA for a while and i apologize dearly. Its just that I've been really really busy. But I've been around and I've kept saying that I'm going to blog. So I'll do it now while the office is quiet.

So far I've been recovering well from my surgeries. I've yet to make a follow up with my PS but i will in due time. I still get pains every now and then but i usually hot water treat them and I'm good to go. I'm not too fond of pills anymore lol.

I've been hitting the gym like a maniac. I'm talking 5 days a week, for about 3 hours a day. Yeah, I'm that determined to get not only my mid, but my body right as well.

Lets not forget about how IN LOVE i am. With Newbs(newbie's new name) Like i really love him. And he knows. And we're cool with that lol. I try to spend as much time with him as possible because I'm always busy and he's always busy, but i love the time we have together. no matter if its at 2am or 2 pm.

Loser is still around. that's still my BFF. no matter what. But lately our friendship has been a lil bleh. we still hang, but i feel like were getting distant. but at this point in my life i refuse to chase someone for any reason but my own happiness. and I'm happy. truly, genuinely happy with where i am right now.

On another note. Yesterday was the anniversary of Brandon's death. and i was such a zombie. i kept having dreams about the night i found out he died. so i tried to keep myself as busy as possible.

But back to the happy tunes: i cant believe the summer is over! I mean, i spent most of it sick and shut in, so i guess i couldnt of expected it to wait for me to get better lol. I did enjoy the time i did use recreationally tho.

Well, that i'l im going to blabber about for now...Until later everyone.

Friday, August 7, 2009

NY Craigslist..oye

OK, its been a while since I've posted ANYTHING, let alone a good ole NY CL men seeking women ad. I stumbled upon this scholar and my eyes sprang tears from the beauty of his writing

Harvard Scholarship Recipient game proper.

Lets see how many grammatical errors one can make. Follow along children:

Whats next girls with bullethole's and stabe Wounds? - 30 (Brooklyn)

I've Posted a few times on Cl and Got some creepy Women replying To my ad.I'm not saying I'm god's gift to Women or it's all about looks,but be realistic When replying to me. I'm Not Looking for a( Interacial relationship) I like women who share many of the same cultural values,psyical traits and Experieances as myself.No I'm not Racist so if your a White nationalist Nut or some Minority with a bad addituide keep it to your self I don't care what You have to say.I'm not into BBW,BIG,THICK or what ever you want to call it. I perfere Petite or athletic Builds and Women with in my age demograpic Having said all That .I'm looking to meet a Mature,Grounded Woman,but at the same time someone who is not To pretentious and is very much down to Earth.I feel it's very Healthy to have a partner someone Whose Got my back when things are good or Bad and I do the same for them.I'm not Interested in one night stands(Well, maybe If your really Hot and can help move me up the socio ecconomic ladder) Hahha.I would like to get married and have kids one day,but Hey It would even be great to just meet someone Who I can learn from and Grow with That shares a Attraction with one another.I'm trying Not to be To serious about Things Because Good things come and go out of our lives . I had the beauitfull girlfriend,but she was To Psycho and even made me a little Psycho. I had The Hot shot Job,but Got Laid off due the Eccomeny.Now I'm Working 10 hours more a week at a Job I'm over Quilified for just To make a living that is not laughiable. I try not to be To pridefull or to serious these days Because I want To Enjoy life and What it has To offer.I don't mean partying,Drinking or Clubbing I hate that stuff. I mean Learning,Evolving,Building meaningfull relationships with people.I'm a Guy whose had a very colorful past and has Lots of Crazzy stories To tell.My Experieances are what give me a certian insite,stranth and Drive To deal with and over comethings. so, If you like what you see or just want to know more Drop me a line with a picture and I will get back to you

Instead of searching for a woman, he needs to be searching for a tutor. And he was goin in too.. For shame.

Tuesday, July 7, 2009

Im BAAaaaAaAaCk!

whew enough of all these somber ass posts I'm back to being good ole C. A.

*waits for applause to end*

::side note:: every time i see the word applause i think apple sauce LOL

Anyways... Ive been recuperating from my surgery i had done 2 weeks ago. And boy did them drugs have me like one of my clients! lmao i was half sleep half slurring all over the damn place.

But the swelling is going down, and ive decided to step away from the Valium & percocets *temporary sad face* lol.

Everything on the other hand is going...aight.. me and the "boo" going thru a lil rough patch right now, but im willing to put in the effort to make it work. But if he acts up my ass is GONE. Its July. 'Tis the season to not being crying over no man. Its the season to get my sexy on. * looks down @ flat tummy with a SMILE* LOL

p.s omg i did my passport and that shit is so thick now you can slice bread with the damn pages LAWD. But my pic is rather ravishing.. compared to that horrid ass driver license pic im stil walkin around with lololol

ok im done chatting for now. ttyl. *besos*

Thursday, June 25, 2009

One Day at a Time..

so its been 3 weeks since my loss.. and i must admit im doing alot better. Better than i expected to be doing. Ive finally come out of my house. Im working again..

I even planned a trip to Jamaica.

i figured that harping on the situation wont change the outcome, so i had to pick myself up and move on.

Me and my baby are still holding on strong.

Im even having my surgery done this saturday. Its all one big staircase that im determind to reach the top of.

Thanks to everybody who showed me support over these last couple of weeks. As much as i thought i needed to go thru it along, sometimes you just need that shoulder, advice, or ear to cheer you on to victory


Tuesday, June 2, 2009

Someone call me a young priest and an old priest.

cuz this negrah is in need of some haysoose christo in his life. At least he opted for boxer-briefs this time.

I wonder whats going thru the cameraman's mind during all o this.

please prep for a plethora of KFC grilled chicken chest boys gettin it on 'n Poppaannnn with some new household furniture. Watch your back Eureka vacuum cleaner.

R.I.P. folding chair *tear* you will be missed.

Monday, June 1, 2009

NY Craigslist... LAWD

lmao. i hate my cousin SO EFFIN MUCH!!

she and i have asecret affair with the men seeking men ads on NY Craigslist.

*le frackin sigh* @ this ish right heh so:

watch hot porn on my video ipod while i suck ur dick in ur car (rp, mv, fh - in your car)

hey guys. i'm looking for a local guy or a guy driving through the area who wants their dick sucked while they enjoy hot straight porn on my video ipod. its very tiny but large screen so its small & discreet. pick me up, park on a nearby street, whip it out, get sucked til u cum in my mouth, i swallow, u drop me off back where u picked me up, we part. no strings. no drama. no chat. just enjoy some hot straight porn while u enjoy my slutty mouth. gay/bi/straight whatever. single/divorced/engaged whatever. none of that matters. all races welcome. all body types welcome. all dick sizes welcome. all ages welcome (but you MUST be over 25 only). so all u need is a car & a dick. reply & lets plan it. this ad is for anytime. you can call me nasty names while you fuck my mouth. it just gets me in a sluttier mood.

i thought that was the worst until:

Date: 2009-05-29, 5:54PM EDT

one of the guys on this site that wants you to be generous/gives massages. i asked beforehand if he was clean and he swore he was just tested for hiv and stds and was clean. i found out yesterday that i have herpes (which by the way, is INcurable, and spreadable even if you don't have any sores). i confronted him about it, and he said, oh well-- i hoped you wouldn't get it. turns out he knows he has it, but he doesn't care since he says that if someone is stupid enough to have sex for money, they "deserve it." he even admitted he's given it to several guys, and just laughs about it! he seemed so nice it was hard to believe he's actually a complete low life (in retrospect, it shouldn't be shocking since he is a whore...). now for the rest of my life i'm gonna have to tell anyone i'm about to have sex with that i may give this to them (condoms help a lot from spreading it, but are not 100% since ball sacks often have infected skin cells). all because of one stupid sex encounter! makes me wonder how many other guys (whores or not) are infected since this site is very "incestuous")

so i'm warning you all-- DON'T PAY FOR SEX FROM ANYONE ON THIS SITE! is it really worth it?!! took you getting BURNED to figure this out GENIASS?

Fallen...and i cant get up

*sigh* i think I'm falling in love with newbie. its CRAZY to me too. i cant even tell you WHEN it happened, but i know its happening. and at this point, i don't even want to fight it anymore. I mean, after everything i went thru with Loser i was like " oh hell no Lucifer will be the UPS delivery man before i get into anything with anyone" and now I'm like, head over heels in love with this guy.

I'm not gonna go say he "perfect, & everything i can ask for" because all that shit is for Brenda Jackson novels. We fight, he gets me upset and the works, but he's a man, that's his job . LOL. but at the end of the day, when I'm layin in my bed, and i think about him, he hits me up. Its like he knows, that when I'm with him, im content. All the drama and the stress is out the door. He makes me happy. When I'm with him, i feel sexy, i feel confident, i feel how a woman should feel when shes in a special situation with someone.

and i feel like he knows. i don't know if i should tell him straight out. but i KNOW he knows. He's even dropped the "L" word a few weeks ago and i kind of giggled it off.

Call me a fool, i don't care. You never know.

Friday, May 29, 2009

Sexy Spec eat yo heart out.

*sighs* C+D can burn in hell for this shit right here.

Spectackylar from Pretty Ricky Ricky Rickay has been seen across the nation slow grinding his way into Boy George's heart all week. Had the nerve to call out other male artists in an all out boi pucci poppin competition and all. but i dont think his bird chested ass was ready for this challenge.

Spec, you got served.

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Annoying Co-Workers 101

*sigh* i have this ONE coworker that is absolutely the WORST person that should have a job whatsoever. She is the slowest, most idiotic person i have ever met. I call her, Pepper Ann. (the resemblance is uncanny i tell ya)

It never ceases to amaze me how slow she is. Everyday i try to find reason for her mental status and say maybe she has a disability, and she cant help it. But no, shes just an idiot.

How would you feel if someone asked you the same question, every day, day by day, with a straight face. Screw everyday, sometimes she'll ask me a question that i just answered about 15-20 prior to her asking me now. All i can do is give her the Kool Aid look, affectionately named after Aunty Mo because I'm tired of being a walking tape recorder. Like today. she asked me for a sheet. I gave her like 20 copies of said sheet so she wouldn't have to ask me for anymore. She went to her office, i guess she had a piece of her beloved ham (dont even get me started) and had the GALL to come back and ask for that paper AGAIN. I was like "um, didn't i just give you a stack?".. And of course, her answer was "O yeah" i swear if she says O yeah one more time the big kool aid is gonna bust thru my office door.


OK, I'm done ranting now.

Thursday, May 21, 2009

How Do You Cope?

over the last month i haven't been able to get Brandon off of my mind. For those of you know don't know who Brandon is, he's my ex. Brandon was murdered on the morning of August 30th, 2008.

it has been tough. i knew him since we were in pre-school. he was such a cute kid. over the years, we would always kind of bump into each other. After high school he approached me on a dating level and i was like, naaa i cant date u (lol) but after i lost contact with newbie in 08, i was like let me give it a try.

we spent almost everyday of last summer together. when i tell u everyday i mean every damn day! he was there for me after i had my surgery. but once i got back on my feet again, we decided a relationship wouldn't work, because or schedules were like night and day.

i still remember our last phone convo. I was in VA beach and he called me.

"babe, where are you?"

me: "I'm in VA beach, why? whats up?"

" ah damn i was gonna come check you..when do you get back?"

me; "Monday, ima link up with you i PROMISE."

"aight then, hit me when u get back."

I got home and it was a crazy week. Wednesday i called him, but he was in Soho, so he text me and said "if i don't see u later I'll see u this weekend" (it was labor day weekend, and i was playing mass on the parkway)

this was the last i heard from him.

i hit him up Saturday night, but he never answered.

Sunday night i learned that he was murdered. 5 blocks from my house, the previous Friday/Saturday @ 1 am. 10 minutes before i walked thru my front door.

the hardest thing i ever had to do was go into his house after he was gone. i could smell him, FEEL him. His funeral took alot out of me. I didn't have the heart to go to the cemetery.

And to this day, since that day in September, i haven't had the heart to call, or go to his house. Every time i try, i get cold feet. And that upsets me. Because i want to reach out to his fam. But his father is HIM its like lookin at what he would've been.

I bought his mom a really beautiful card months ago. but i haven't had the heart to drop it off...let alone mail it. Maybe i'll do that this weekend. As a birthday gift to him.

May 23rd would've been his birthday. Happy Birthday Brandon. I miss you.

Friday, May 15, 2009

A lil Jokey Joke

Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His Wife was really pissed. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE !!" The next morning he got up early and left to work. When his wife woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough a box was girft-wrapped in the middle of the driveway. Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the drive way, brought the box back in the house. She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale. You Welcome U Fat Biitch


Thursday, May 14, 2009


im sorry to jack this but i need this on my page to bring me delight on a day to day basis

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

minor dilemma

Ok so newbie is back from his trip. and we've ironed out those few kinks *side eye* that we had last week.

His birthday is RAPIDLY approaching. and i dont have a CLUE what to get him. This will be my first time celebrating his birthday with him because last year i was out of comission due to my surgery. He has anything/everything he could want! and i dont want to get him some generic ass gift.. i mean this is a guy who weres Ferragamo shit on a rainy friggin day. *sigh*

I was just going to show up to his house in a trench and stilettos lol, but i could do that any day.

So, im open to suggestions as to what to get him for his birthday.

Please & Thanks.

Monday, April 20, 2009

Its must be yo ass cuz it aint yo face...

aight thanks to the folks over at the Crackbox i decided to blog on a subject that has come up frequently recently.

Have you ever seen a GOOD looking girl in the club, and then you see her friend and she is UGLY as SIN? Or you see a good lookin guy or girl and their man or woman is vomitrocious?

I have. And what kills me is that the ugly one is going the hardest to get attention. Or if her friend is getting attention, she's quick to cock block. What kills me about this is that there are some pretty girls who would PURPOSELY befirend unattractive people to make herself look better. But at what cost to the other person? Is the unattractive person so blinded by the fact that they have a fly friend they dont realize the superficiality of their relationship? Not only that, the unattractive person tends to act like they're the finest thing since a ball point pen.

In the reltionship aspect the first thing people say is the "he/she must give good head/spend money/spoil them to keep that person around"(grimey LOL)

this can flop either way as far as personality too. Ive seen some gorgeous people with the ugliest attitudes and vice versa.

Dont get me wrong. Im not saying that Good & Bad looking people cant be friends. And i am by far the last person who should judge on this subject, but at the same time i always wonder the backstory to those relationships. They could be like me. I dont think ANY of my friends are unattractive. And i would never let my friends come out lookin a fool for my own benefit...But thats me.

10 things i believe i know about men.

ok so over the weekend i had time to think about ALL of the men in my life. and there are some things that they do or say that seem to just come natural to them. Here's my take on it...

10) Men sometimes lie because it’s easier than telling the truth.
This is pretty much self explainitory. The funny thing is, i can usually tell when their lying. but i never say anything. i prefer to let them believe they got away with it and then use it against them at a later date. (lol)

9) Men like to gossip just as much as women do.
ABSOLUTELY. Having Jack & Joe as friends ive seen this front han. They talk about everybody's situation, how they wouldve handled it, etc etc. like old women on a stoop its hilarious. and when you tell them they're gossiping they deny it.

8) Men are bad at remembering dates.
Unless it has something to do with them. My dad couldnt even remember my sisters birthday for cryin out loud.

7) Men are scared of the term forever.
The minute you say "we'll be togethere forever" he's already half way out of the door. The only time they seem to like it is during sex lol "this is yours forever!"

6) Men don’t want to admit it, but they need women in their lives.
The same go for women. Sometimes they hate the fact that the NEED us, but they do. And not even for major things. the little things, like giving him little massages, cooking for him, umm rockin the all matters to them as much as they try to deny it.

5) Men take sports seriously.
Conversations during game time is an absolute no-no. God forbid you tell him you want to go out during the playoffs. Yesterday i slept through a zilllion games because well. i couldnt deal with it lol. And lets not mention when i almost got body slammed out of excitement when the Giants won the superbowl.

4) Men can’t take hints.
Dont even bother droppng any. If you want to say something, s-p-e-l-l-i-t-o-u-t. Because more then likely they'll misconstrue your hint, and it will backfire on you.

3) Men are visual beings.
This is the reason they like porn, strip clubs, or just to see you do a lil sum'n sum'n freaky for them every now and then. A mans mind is a visual playground. If you talk dirty to your man on the phone, there is a guarantee he has his thoughts going south, because he can mentally picture you doing what you say youre doing.

2) Men care what others think of them, and even dress up for others.
Even though they may not say it, they are. Any male ive been acquainted with has been almost as much into fashion as me. Making sure their hair is always cut, nails are always clean. When they go out, they make sure their outfit is on point, cologne smelling good, everything. And trust me its well appreciated.

1) Men can’t help but check out other women.
And that is OK. shit, if she's fine, im looking too! Its a natural reaction for men.I dont understand why chics get so angry when their man takes a peek at another girl. HE'S WITH YOU!! let him look all he wants. Some of them even try to deny it which is funny cause at the end of the day he's giving you the goods, so obviously you have something he likes.

Monday, April 13, 2009

I needed a new blog post

I been having complaints about the peen warmers (lmao) tickels me still
anywho i figured i'd do somethin outta my usual post pics of myself from vegas lol. (clearly im bored)

Lunch @ The Cheesecake Factory

first night in vegas

in the bathroom at NY NY lol (our bathrooms do NOT look like this at all)

@ the club

Me and my homegirl

dont be fooled i was definitely drunk in this pic lol

this nucca right here..lmaoo had us ctfu

Thursday, April 9, 2009








Wednesday, April 8, 2009

He's so good, so good, so OooOOh, Shit. Damn!

Ok this post is dedicated to newbie.

i'm real diggin this guy..and i think its a sign...peep what happened sunday night.

So as you all know, newbie left for Europe when i left for Vegas. his trip was supposed to last til 4/11. I knew that i would have some um..technical difficulties not seeing him for 2 weeks so i made sure to send him off with a smile *Wink*. I spoke to him when he first got to Manchester when i came back from Vegas last monday. I missed him something TERRIBLE.

To keep my mind off of him i picked up a few side hustles, and went out with my girls. i tried my best to stay clear of the LOSER cause i know how he is about newbie.

So sunday comes and my mom cooks. Loser always comes by, so it was no biggie. He was passin thru before he had to head over to his best friends house. He comes, has lil play fights with the twerp (my sister) and eats. So after we eat he comes and throws is 6'2 215 self across my lil ole bed. Im like boy move! he's like girl hush lets watch the game. I dont even remember wtf was on. So anyway i lay in the lil crevice of bed left infront of Loser. and lord. all of a sudden i got horny as HELL!..idk wtf came over me. and the thing with the loser is he knows me SOOOO well he just looked at me and i kno he could tell that i was ready to get it. Just as soon as he was about to make his move im like, what time u heading to the BF? (im tryna stall) and he goes searchin in his pockets. Only to realize that he left his phone in his car. so he goes to the car.and i use that lil time to compose myself. Just as i begin to relax, my phone rings...Its NEWBIE!!! omg so im like "hi baby!" and he's like "surprise boo, im home..i missed you like crazy" and the loser walks in like BF called i gotta dip u want me to come back? and im like naa u good ima ttyl. So i get up get dressed and dash to see newbie.

what a reunion....whew

please tell me that the gods were not workin in my favor? like that was a serious sign for me to not get into anythin with the loser. i couldve screwed up what im trying to build...

Monday, April 6, 2009


So my homegirl Quana and i were talkin about dating and i was letting her know that im not a "dater" So she's like "ahh so what you do, talk and text, thats wack" I'm like "girl no, but the last date i went on set me off the dating track about 40 miles"

why dont you all be the judge..

Last September my friend Nya and i went to a club in Brooklyn. (mistake # 1. I never club in Brooklyn but i didnt feel like drivin into the city) So we're dancing, holdin up the bar, looking cute, you know, the usual. Her homeboy comes up to her and they're talking and stuff and I peep his friend is a lil cutie! He seems cool. So when the club lets out he asked for my number, and im like "ah what the hell his people kno my people so what the deal. (mistake #2. i never ever give out my number. i always take theirs. damn absolut had me makin bad decisions)

From the night i gave him my number, he called. I mean everyday. We talked about everything there was to talk about. Past relationships, our jobs...everything. All the bases were covered. Now, i wasnt looking for anything in particular, because this wasnt that long after Brandon's death. I just needed a little company.

After 2 weeks of convo he hits me up one sunday night and asks if i wanna go out to eat. I had already eaten so he was like "aight we can get drinks and chill, whatev." so im like cool. i told him where i lived and he came for me (mistake # 3. i NEVER let people come get me. i always drive to wherever we got to go for myself. but alternate side parkin rules caused me to slip up. F u Bloomberg.)

Anyway, he shows up in his nice lil whip and im like ok where we goin, he says "applebees" im like ok cool there's like 3 applebees in bk so i kno i wont be out any where too late, i had to work the next morning.

So, this mofo starts drivin..and he gets on the belt parkway, which is cool, except he was goin in the opposite direction of applebees in BK. this fool is makin his way towards Long Island. So im like "ok Courts, just see where he's going" he drives us alllll the way to the 5 towns Applebees, which is a good 45 minutes from my house. So im already annoyed(lol). We get in there and he's like " u drinkin?" and im like na i have to work int he mornin. He goes ahh u no fun have a drink.

this fool orders 4...yes FOUR top shelf Long Island Iced Teas. i hate those. so im like umm im not drinkin that. You know, he sat there and drank all 4 of them str8 like it was kool aid? so im like "fuck this nigga bout to be drunk and im all the way in fuckin LI with no car shiiiiittt"

so im like aight take me home, cuz i figure if i can get him to take me back to bk before that shit set in he can kill himself on his way home.

he's like aight cool but lemme run to my crib quick, i live around the block. So im like aight just make it quick. (mistake #4. i shouldve stayed in applesbees and called a cab) While he's doin whateva it is he's doin, i say i gotta use the restroom and call the Loser. He wasnt answerin. So i left him a message like call me ASAP.

I come out the bathroom, which is connected to his room. and tell me WHYYY this nigga standin there BUTT ASS NAKED. talkin bout "boo lets talk." Im too busy standing there laughin at his micro erection that i dont notice him comin up to me. SO im like "umm yea we need to dip" but he already tryna grab on me, all slurring and shit. Im gettin madder and madder and he's gettin rougher and rougher. Finally i had enough and puched him in his face. He slumped over, and threw up all over his bed, and then proceeded to pass out.

ALL im thinkin about is let me get the FUCK outta here. So im grabbin my purse and shit. And im so mad. i went lookin for his car keys cuz i was definitely gonna drive myself home and then proceed to set his car on FIRE. anyway while im tryna gather myself the loser calls and i tell him whats goin down. He's mad as HELL and he tells me to get outta of there ASAP. So i rush out of there and start walkin back to the best of my memory. Im good. until i realize i cant read the street signs. I left my fuckin glasses in this freak's bathroom!!! i was so angry omg omg
i walked a good 20 blocks before i found a cab service. it had to be about 2am by now.
so on the ride and im venting to the cab driver and he's like damn ma thats fucked up and shit. So $40 later he pulls up to my house like "so, whats good with that number"...

Anyway. i was so upset the next day i stayed home with loser. So the freak has the AUDACITY to call me on some "why did u leave last night ?"shit. i was like "___________" oh hell fucking no. SO i remain calm and cool and was like "yea u played yourself and i need my glasses" lol

SO Loser tells Jack & Joe, and them fools are ready to KILL this guy. So Me, Loser, Jack & Joe drive back up there..and im like "yo come outside and give me my glases" this nigga comes to the storm door, pushes the glasses thru the mail slot and slams the door shut.

Thats the last i ever saw or heard from him.

and this, boys and girls, i why I DONT DATE.

Tuesday, March 31, 2009


omg i had the most POPPIN weekend in LIFE!! Sheesh i made Vegas my playground. between the food, shoppin, and 2 foot tall margaritas i should be filing for chatper 11 right about now.. lol but im not.. o man it was perfect. great weather.. some FINE ass specimens, good clubbin, goin to sleep @ 7 am, waking up at 2pm. lol we were actina str8 up foooolll.. I even had a vegas "boo" (he proclaimed) that was buyin me and my homegirl drinks all weekend. i met Lil Wayne & Floyd Mayweather was givin me sexy eye. lol best birthday ever.

i missed the hell outta Newbie tho. He left for London on i had to send him off thursday night..whew lawd two weeks hurry the hell up!

blame it on the ah a a a ah alocohol!

Thursday, March 26, 2009

50 years from Now...

I officially CANNOT STAND the NY Daily News for this bull shit.. LMFAOOOOO

your favorite stars 50 years from now....






Wednesday, March 25, 2009


Yes, its FINALLLLLY here!! I'm 21!!!! wwwooooooohoooooooooo

so far its been a good day. i was a little nostalgic this morning because last year i spent my birthday with Brandon. Its cool tho, i know he's looking down on me to make sure i dont get tooo zooted. lol

i already got some nice gifts too..a personalized bible (sweet) some new shoes and a sex offer. lmao @ the last one.

Happy Birthday to me.

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Dudes hate too,..

i bumped into the loser this weekend. so we're back on civil terms. DO NOT MISTAKE THIS FOR SCREWING...i said CIVIL. lol. i can have a moderate conversation with him without wanting to toss him or my blackberry out of a window.

Anywho, remember Jack & Joe? (see old posts) Well, i was twistin Jack's new growth and the loser came up. Idk WHY Jack & Joe ride the losers cock so damn hard. But they seem to think im makin a big mistake by starting somethin with my Newbie. They only saw him once, the day after christmas when i asked Joe to take me to get him since i didnt have my car.

Now, Newbie is very humble, down to earth. So he said whats up to them and talked to me the whole 5 minute ride, which is fine, cuz i hate a man who doesnt know how to shut the fuck up.

So last night, Jack is like " i dont like that dude (newbie)" and im like, why? he couldnt give me a straight answer. But im sre it has to do with the fact that i refused to ever give Jack access to my sin bin, and i let Newbie take a dip in it. (not that they kno that)

but ever since i started talkin to newbie jack & joe, who dont kno him from a glass of water, got shit to say. Askin me questions like "where he live?" "where he work?" Newbie has his own crib, and a great job. Joe is in the military and Jack is too tempermental to ever keep a freakin job....oh wait, he's an "artist" both live with mommy or fam. Now, dont get me wrong, i still chill @ home, but i dont say shit about the kinda chicks they go . Hate hate hate thats all i see and hear when they try to "compare" newbie to the loser.

whateveerrrr lolol

Monday, March 23, 2009


what a GREAT weekend.. i havent had such a good weekend in a long time. just thought i'd share.

ta ta for now.


Thursday, March 19, 2009

it's about me now II

so its day 4 in my "silent treatment" by the loser. and still no effects. i've tried to contact him a few times, and no answer. so im officially finito. got other things to worry my TRIP! whew in 7 days i will be makin it rain on the Las Vegas strip!!! i dont lost my mind buying shoes and outfits for my lil mini vacay....i even decided to complete my life transformation with a new haircut and all..

im not letting him get me down, as much as he would like to lol. And everyday i get the cold shoulder from him, i get the warm hug from my new "boo" ( who really isnt "new" per se but we're closer now than we were before)

im feelin like a milli a milli a milli. lol

p.s. Im feelin The Dream's new album.. Fancy & Right Side of Ya Brain are on heavy iPod rotation.

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Racism Aint Dead...

ok, so this Russian dude been tryna get at me via myspace/aim for a while now. but i keep tellin him im not interested. obviously he has issues with rejection..cuz this is how the last convo we had went.

so funny you dont see peoples true colors til you dont give them what they want. Ima call him "whitey" for today..

Whitey: hello wow long time?
Whitey: how u been?
Me: ive been ok
Whitey: o ok arm is better and all that
Me: so so
Whitey: ooo
Whitey: ill make it feal better for u lol
Whitey: so whats up would u still meet me and chill with me
Whitey: or u still not ready for all that?
Me: i cant
Me: lol u so determind
Whitey: why not?
Me: because i cant
Whitey: whatever
Me: whatever?
Me: hmm ok, whatever.
Whitey: go enjoy your est ny men
Me: ? east ny
Me: lol i dont fraternize with those males thank you
Whitey: wa
Me: ??
Whitey: a nice white guy is trying to chill with u and u r talking mad dum i cant for real u pissing me off
Me: first of all dont come at me like that
Me: secondly white black chinese it doesnt matter
Me: im going thru somethin personal right now so i dont have time for anyone
Me: so please save that for somebody else.
Whitey: whatever shorty u to young to go thrue shit for real
Me: thats what u think but i dont know the life ive lived
Whitey: u tell it to someone else u live woth moms
Me: so u cant tell me
Whitey: in da hood
Me: lmao
Me: sorry sweety i do live with my mother but not in the hood
Whitey: o yea where do u live
Me: wouldnt u like to kno
Whitey: u prob live canarcie bed sty est ny or bronsivelle
Me: lol nope nope and nope
Me: sorry
Whitey: flatbsuh
Me: nope
Me: hahahaha
Whitey: crown hights
Whitey: hood
Me: silly little thing
Me: nope
Whitey: all your projects i just named
Me: lmao
Whitey: fort green
Me: im from the projects now?
Me: this is good
Whitey: well im sure u dont live in bayridge or bergan beach or mill basen
Me: lmao
Whitey: so please do tell
Whitey: im hoping im so wrong
Me: please dont insult me
Me: cuz i live in one of the 3
Whitey: that u r going thrue some times
Me: and im going to need u to spell check yourself before you get "smart"
Whitey: i dont care how to spell your areas as longest i know how to spell mines we good
Me: just because i'm not jumpin at your offer you want to act brand new
Me: trying to pull a race card
Me: hahahahha
Me: please
Whitey: i have nothing but been nive to u and showed u mad love
Whitey: and alwyes asked u how u feal
Whitey: but i get nothing but a bad vibe from u all the time for real
Whitey: im not some fucking loser here
Me: and i never deferred you from that
Me: i never said you were but i cant just be chillen with anybody right now
Whitey: i dont sell rocks on the corner of your hood im a very nice guy with a degree who was looking to meet some1 new
Whitey: but im sure u still chill and go out side right
Me: ok and i dont live in a "hood" i come from a very good home i go to a good college but im going thru somethin personal
Whitey: im sure your life is still going
Me: no i dont
Me: i dont party i dont chill
Me: unless its a family function
Me: i work. thats all i do.
Whitey: then u must be a depressed person
Me: no sweetheart im not depressed but i have to make decisions at the moment that may change my life
Me: not that you need to know because i dont owe you an explanation
Whitey: u must be having a baby by shovon then
Me: sorry im not knocked up either
Me: do you have any other black girl stereotypes you want to throw this way?
Me: because its amusing.
Me: your whole attitude towards "hood" people is sad
Me: because everything you named i never came from.
Me: but you only see that im brown and you generalize
Me: such a shame.
Me: i guess not coming from the "hood" having a doctor and an army sergeant as parents still makes me from the "hood"
Me: having my own car makes me "hood"
Me: nothing to say now?
Me: you had so much to comment on before

he still hasnt responded..hmpf

its about me now

lately I've been feeling so good about my decisions. altho right now the loser isn't speaking to me, I'm still happy. the old me would've been trying so hard to get him to talk to me, but i realize now that that was my big mistake. why should i kiss his ass when i know i was right for me? after all we've been thru, he's mad because i wont sleep with him. the man who claims to love me no matter what is actin like a bitch because he's not the center of my world anymore. Get over it. Its time to move on. you wanna ride the single train, so hop aboard the shit, don't hang from the railing.
Its not even a point of me talking to someone else now, because i am. and he makes me happy. I thought that the loser would appreciate getting his space, but it seems like he wants to eat the candy, and not get the cavities..nope, not on my watch. the old me, maybe. but over the last few months I've come to realize that i did all of my living for everyone else's happiness and not my own. and cant do that anymore. because if god is to snatch me from earth tonight i want to go knowing i lived as best i could for ME first, and everyone else second.

ima consider this my second coming.

Thursday, March 12, 2009

lmao..god this video is a mess

man i used to be rotflmao to this shit

she reminded me of my old dance teacher something serious
i would've just been like "take me to jail pleasssseeee"
he was gettin it IN lmao *kick ball change*

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Is this how it is?

So now that I'm back on my single grind, me and my "ex" had a discussion about how to date.

He was saying that he found it ok to talk to 5 different girls, with no intention to date any of them. This is how it went:

Me: "so, if you wanna start dating one of them, how do you let the others know?"
Him: "i don't."
Me: "you..don't.."
Him : "na, not if they don't ask"
Me: laughs " so, if she doesn't ask if you're talking to anyone you wont say anything? what girl is gonna ask u if u chillin with anyone if y'all were talkin and now ur dating?"
Him thinks "na, i don't mean it like that"
Me: "yea you do. and then you're gonna bitch and moan that she always questions you, yadda yadda... that's the worse way to go into a relationship"
Him: i know, but i wanna exercise all of my options before i make a commitment"
Me: "right..and how many successful relationships do you have under your belt?"


Friday, March 6, 2009

I'll love him, and kiss him, and call him George...

Last night i tried sooo hard to convince my mom last night to let me buy a bunny. lmaoo i mean, my landlord said not cats or dogs..she didn't say didly squat about a bunny. My mom was like "girl, he gonna get lost in all them shoe boxes you got!" Sheesh, so my obsession with footwear is effecting my opportunity to buy a pet?

a small setback in my eyes.

i got it all planned I hate being devious but i want one sooo bad. We used to have a class rabbit in 2nd grade named Hosenfeffer and i got to take him home a few times and *swoon* i haven't been the same since.

so wish me luck folks, maybe when i get back from Vegas I'll post some pics of my new pet. lol

Friday, February 27, 2009

Toes done up, with tha' fanga nails matchin...

So my homegirl & i were out shoppin for our Vegas trip the other day, and we stopped somewhere that was selling funky nail polish. I LOVE bright, odd colored polishes, its my trademark. So there I am, picking up yellow, orange..all sorts of shit and she was like "damn i wanna get some too but my man only likes french." I'm like so? its your hands and feet and you mean to tell me you deprive yourself of originality because he likes it? Don't get me wrong, i went thru the french pedi/mani phase for about 6 months, but i had to stop, cuz i was lookin like every other female. and i hate that lol.

**side note** Why don't women realize that pedicure maintenance is a YEAR round responsibility? like, you think u can go all winter with them feet that look like yams and then expect Ms. Chen to pull out a Black & Decker sander for them shits in June? c'mon lets keep it 100 girls..a pedi ain't but $15..shit ain't nobody gonna see them feet, but how many sheet sets are you willing to sacrifice with them cheese grater heels?

*back to topic*
I've always been curious to know what it is about French manis/pedis that make men go so wild. I know it looks real nice, sophisticated, but Ive gotten compliments on my unique polish choices as well. so i want to know what about it is such a big deal? lol put me on...

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

I give good head....

ok so after that off topic from yesterday's post i was having a convo with a good friend of mine about head...both male and female.

i enjoy giving head(lol) gasp! i do. no need for me to deny it. i do what i do cuz i like it. and im good at it. that doesn't make me a hoe. i don't give everybody head, just my man. i was in the nail salon and this girl was talking to her friend about it like she was talking about no getting a tax return. she was like she was mad her man brought it up after they been together so long, how he loves to go down on her but she refuses to return the favor. in my mind I'm like "she so selfish" cuz she made it seem like she didn't do it cuz she never did, not that she didn't like to. i hate people who shoot things down before giving it a go at least once.

giving good head obviously takes practice. i ain't a porn star so don't expect some super duper spectacular stuff, but i will do my best to make ya toes curl lolol.

on to another thing. is swallowing a big deal to men? i mean, i don't have a preference to swallow or not to swallow, but some men love it and others find it "hoe" like? is that because of how its portrayed in porn. how do you bring this up to know if its OK? do you go" hey boo ima suck ya dick, should i swallow, spit it out or let ya shoot ya load into the air?" lmao i don't know..somebody put me on..

"I used to be scared of the i throw lips at the shit...handle it like a real bitch.." -Lil' Kim

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Light Skin Vs. Dark Skin...

As a "dark skin" female i sometimes have an issue with this topic. The other day i was in the nail salon and this fair skinned lady said to me "you're such a pretty dark skinned girl" i said thank you, but in the back of my mind I'm like, "what does that mean? she usually sees ugly dark skinned girls?" I'm not insecure about my looks at all. At a time i was. Most of my friends are lighter than i am. In high school they always seemed to get more male attention then i did, but that really didn't phase me in all honesty. Men always seem to want that light skin, light eyed, long haired chick. We see it in videos, in books, in movies, hear it in songs...But why? what is it about a "light skinned" chick that a dark skin woman can't offer? Last time i checked, i've seen just as many hideous light skinned women as dark skinned ones. I'm not a hater at all, i get plenty attention when i step out. I come from an extremely diverse family so my skin color was never a big deal growing up. I'm considered "exotic" i suppose *shrug* It just kind of bothers me to see light and dark skinned women sort of compete when they are out. And the men just eat it up. I guess some people just still have that house slave/ field slave mentality. I'll never get it...

Heaven, I need a Hug...

OK so I've been shopping compulsively lately. Shoes, bags, anything. you name it. I bought 8 pairs of shoes within 2 days last weekend. I couldn't figure out what the problem was but now i think i do. Lack of SEX. lolol. I haven't had sex in forever. Actually, i realize that lately i don't even want to, which is odd cause i LOVE me some dick. Yea i said it. I'm not a prude. I like to get mines...

*off topic* why are females so ashamed to admit they give head? is that still taboo? Cuz really i don't see what the big deal is. I enjoy knowing i can satisfy my man in numerous ways. Besides, if your man is so fresh and so clean why not offer him a little lip and tongue service every now and then? All the ladies want a man to give them a lick down, but don't want to return the favor. BITCH please. get over yourself. if you wont do it, someone else will.

OK now that i got that off my chest, back to the subject at hand. I've realized that there definitely is a direct correlation with my shopping/no sex problem. So i don't need shoppers anonymous, just nice long stiff one. But i've been at ends with the loser since our little...situation. I have a "boo", but everytime i try to see him something happens to prevent me from getting to the good stuff. lol. LAWD

Thursday, February 19, 2009

Weird But True...

He has GOT to be the worse kidnapper EVER...Seriously.
Oh, what torture.
A man held a woman hostage in Toledo, Ohio, for three days, and did nothing but read the Bible to her.
Troy Brisport grabbed the woman off the street, handcuffed her, put her in an adult diaper and read nonstop to her.
She escaped after he fell asleep...

Friday, February 13, 2009

This Week's Candy Memory Is.


All these were was color, sugar, and water to hold that together..but obviously nutrition fats were'nt on my mind when i ate these.. The only flaw was that you'd have to spend forever removing the paper from the back of the candy. Or you could've been a Greedy McBean and ate whatever it is you pulled off the paper...

Sunday, February 8, 2009

I Hate....

i need to air out some of the things i really hate.. here we go lol

-open-toe shoes worn with stockings.

- people over the age of 25 with Sidekicks.

-Manpris. If your going to wear shorts, wear shorts. If your going to wear long pants, wear long pants. THERE IS NO MIDDLE GROUND.

-The McDonalds on Avenue H. I swear everyone who works there is special. They move slow, forget your order..Just a mess.

-Girls who wear eyeshadow wrong.

-People who wear the exact outfit on a display mannequin. Now everyone knows its from H&M.

-Glasses with no lense.

-People who walk slow then abruptly stop on a busy street or in the train station.

-People who sit with their legs wide open on a crowded train, taking up 2 seats.

-Men who don't give their seats to elderly, pregnant or women with babies.

-People who yell into their cellphones.

-Sunglasses, giant pocketbooks/purses/hanbags, fur coats, & bluetooth headsets in the club

-People who sing a song mad loud with the wrong lyrics.

- When natural hair and weave dont match(texture, color, or both)

- people who drive slow, then speed up at the yellow causing you to be stuck at the light

-People who dont move to the back of th bus.

-When people act ghetto/loud/obnoxious in a public area.

-When people assume everyone in/from Brooklyn knows eachother.

-When you tell someone you're West Indian and they automatically think you're Jamaican or Haitian.

-When you go shopping and a person puts something down, and you pick it up, and they go back and pick up that same item because you did.

-When people stare at the menu forever at McDonalds.

-People who act extra in the club(throwin money *eye roll*, splitting)

-When you tell somebody youre gonna call them back and they call you 5 minutes later like, "why you aint call me back?"

-Leather bombers with cartoon characters on them.

-Overweight girls who tuck their shirts into their jeans and pull the belt so tight the gut hides the belt.

-People who feel the need to share what their shit is and how much it costs in pictures.

-People who listen to music/ringtones without headphones in public.

-Cracked, chapped, peeling lips.

-People who dont like something but do it or like it because you say you do.

LOL Sorry this list has been building..and will continue to grow.

Monday, February 2, 2009

F^#K You Punxsutauney Phil!!!

Do we REALLY need six more weeks of winter?

Who the hell is this mother fucker to tell me i gotta freeze my ass off until my birthday?

All because he saw his damn shadow. I see my shadow all the time, does that mean I'm going to have 6 more weeks of heartburn? Will i get paid extra for the next 6 weeks? NO. He sees his damn shadow and we all have to suffer. He didn't think we had enough winter to last us awhile already? It was about 39 degrees in MIAMI a week ago. But he wouldn't know that because he lives in a damn hole. Regardless of how cold it is he gonna be chillin in his chinchilla while I'm turning into a sexy Popsicle walking down Lexington Avenue...

So go F yourself Punxsutauney Phil.


Tuesday, January 27, 2009

From A Man's Point Of View...

OK, so i have these 2 guy friends who i can talk to about pretty much anything. So last night, while i was re twisting one's dreads, we got into a conversation about relationships. Jack & Joe (that's what we're gonna call em) were arguing about how they approach dating someone....who's already in a relationship.

Jack feels as tho that's an automatic plus. Because he feels that since shes already attached to someone, she wont be all up in his face all the time. "I love being the other man..its the prime position to be in" So I'm like "why?" and he's like "because that means I'm not entitled to do anything." So Joe's like "that's stupid, because if you ever get into a relationship with that girl you're not going to trust her because of how y'all got together"

Joe's more traditional. he feels that he needs to get a girl fair and square. "I don't want to have to compete for her attention," he said. "cause Karma is a bitch and you will never be happy because you will only get the shit you dish out. And what man in their right mind wont mind a cheater?"

So Jack, being a man, is like "i don't care. if my girl is going to cheat, she can cheat. I always tell the girls i date that she wont be the only one..." Me and Joe look at each other and laugh because Jack has been riding the single train to Georgia for months now.

Don't get me wrong. Both Jack and Joe are good peoples. But that's crazy how some men think..

Oh, The Weather Outside Is Frightful..

So I'm going to need you to not be dressed like you have hot flashes or you're an extra on the set of Gossip Girls. Yes, they do film the show in the area, so your finger my get some t.v. time. But is a bright future filled with arthritis pains and bengay dreams worth it?
I mean, we woke up in the same city, right? We probably didn't watch the same weather channel, but most of the time they all have pretty much the same forecast (About 30 degrees..possible snow) ... So why am i dressed like the Abominable Snowman and you look like you're about to go to the beach or get on a swing? How are so cold you have on a pea coat but so hot you wearing flip flops? Or a uniform with no stockings? Maybe I'm the one that needs to be checked out by my primary care physician because I'm starting to feel like I'm the crazy one..